OK, WHAT THE FUCK is it with men walking around carrying purses?

I’m not talking about computer bags, back packs, brief cases, I’m talking about things that are clearly purses. Too small for a computer, too big for a camera bag, clearly meant for a woman to carry.

I swear, the male race needs to butch it up a bit or I’m gonna have to start kicking asses and taking names.

Sounds like Mel has just ended his career with this one. What a dickhead. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FdEMd3a2gg&feature=watch_response Fuck off and go to your island and die you fucktard!

The invitation to my sister’s wedding.

Her second wedding. To the guy she’s been living with for 5 years and has two kids with. At 44.

Now I know I’m an asshole and everything, but I have to wonder what the big fucking hairy deal is. Why are they even bothering with a wedding?

Well, I’ll tell you…

See… Personally, I don’t really think most straight people take their marriages very seriously. To straight people, weddings are something they take for granted… something they plan for their whole lives… something they’re getting ready for before they even meet the person they’re going to do it with.  It’s just an excuse to get lots of presents, have a “special” day.. or… more accurately… Days..

Oh.. to a lot of straight people, weddings aren’t much more than a big party. They’ve never had to work or fight for the right to get married… it’s always just assumed they’d do it.

And let’s face it… to them it’s not even a long-term thing. Go ask the people in line of relative strangers in Vegas and Reno, waiting to get married by an Elvis impersonator. Straight people look at marriages as a convenient thing to do. As a way to get swag.

Straight people say that marriage is this fantastic institution based on raising children and protecting the family as the cornerstone of society and Blah Blah Blah.

But straight people have a way of exempting themselves from the rules they set up for other people.

Which brings me to the topic of GAY marriage.

I remember when the nasty old bag Elsie Wayne, Canadian politician, made this big stink about how straight people don’t parade through the streets making a spectacle of themselves and “call that a marriage.”  Um… really? Cuz I’ve been caught behind an awful lot of annoying straight people driving slow, honking horns, throwing confetti, waving out the sun roof and showing big “JUST MARRIED” signs on cars decorated with paper flowers and streamers.  Sounds like a parade to me.

No… seems that a slim majority of straight people still want to keep marriage for themselves. Not because they buy any of their own bullshit… if they really meant a word of it, couples who married and didn’t have offspring within 18 months would be divorced by the state and charged with fraud. If they really meant it, fertility tests would be done before marriage licenses were issued and divorce would be illegal.

But it’s only gay people who have the whole “marriage is sacred and for procreation” shit ground in our faces. I mean, my sister’s been popping out young’uns  for years with no binding legal contract picked up at city hall and her first marriage didn’t produce any kids at all.

But see… we all know the real reason that the majority of straight people don’t want us to get married. It’s because they know we’d do it better than them.

Before you get all indignant and get your lace panties in a bunch, let’s just face facts. Gay people do things better. We always have.

Gay people have been historically the cultural and moral leaders of humanity. We’re the single aunts and uncles who can be available to care for elderly parents, can be relied upon for emotional and financial support. We’re the single teachers who can stay late after school to help the students who need extra help. If the gay community has shown anything in the last 30 years, it’s that even in the face of AIDS, with out best friends withering and dying all around us, we stayed altruistic and even fun-loving while working to save ourselves and our friends.  And we did it by dancing down the street in the face of blind, seething hatred.

Gay people have been much more politically active per capita. Although more people claim to have been abducted by aliens than claim to be gay, we’ve clawed our way to the few toe-hold rights we have.

There certainly isn’t any argument that we’re the creators of art and culture. As Harvey Fierstein once pointed out, without gay people, fashion would fall into two categories: Fig Leaves and Grape Leaves. If you ever wonder why music, fashion, art, architecture and style all sucked so bad in the mid 80s to early 90s… well it’s because the world lost a whole generation of gay men to AIDS. And most of you said we deserved it.

Hey, we even make the best wedding planners. How ironic is that?

Which brings me back to gay marriage yet again.

Now yes… I know…. nearly half of straight people voted for gay marriage in California’s last election and I have no reason to think that next time it will be over half. I know that a lot of straight people are VERY supportive and strongly so. They have nothing to motivate them other than doing the right thing and I thank them for it.

But I still think we’d do not only weddings but our relationships better than straight people.  Just call it a hunch.

Mr.Reeve writes………….Gay Marriage. An issue that is not an issue to me. I believe anyone who loves someone else should be able to get married as many times as they want. Notice I said “as many times”? Straight people who have a problem with two adults wanting to show their dedication to each other need to get over themselves. Look at all these idiot celebs and idiots in general who have 1 day, 5 day, 1 month, etc. marriages. That is the definition of ruining the true meaning of marriage. Taking marriage and the person you marry for granted seems all too common.

With that being said, we can not have a post about Gay Marriage without addressing Prop 8. We know that the Mormon influence along with the heavy black vote that showed up election day in support of President Obama in California is why Prop 8 passed. If not for these two scenarios it would have failed. I know how the gay community feels about Mormons, but how do you feel about the black voters who voted for Prop 8?

Please share your opinions in the comment thread.

Yeah, yeah… I know. And I’m sick of hearing it.

Every year I go and ride my motorcycle in the parade, hang out at the festival, smoke a cigar at the cigar tent, meet some new people, watch a few bands play, have a beer or three, buy a couple souvenirs and then go home and read the mainstream media’s report on it which will include pictures of the most outrageous freaks they can find, looking repulsive and tripped-out, along with a description about how bizarre and overly sexual the whole thing was.

They’ll show lots of the Dykes On Bikes (my group of riding buddies calls them the “Cunts On Cruisers”). But only the fattest ones, extra points for the topless ones with horse shoes in their sagging boobs.

They’ll show the most outrageous drag queens they can find.

They’ll show a 90 year-old man in chaps and a harness, showing his ass.

Then every year my straight friends and uptight gay friends all chime in with the same refrain… “how come they don’t have any NORMAL people in the parade? Why is it only freaks and drag queens?”  “Those pride parades are what’s holding back gay equality” “people at home see that and vote against us.”

I say “shut up.”

Ok there’s nothing more annoying than a gay guy who sits and home and whines about how the gay community doesn’t represent him. The whole world isn’t going to shoehorn itself into your ideal party just to please you. You want the gay community to represent guys like you, you gotta be IN the parade. If it wasn’t for a bunch of freaks and drag queens who’d finally had enough and fought back at the Black Cat in Silverlake in 1967 and the Stonewall Inn in New York in 1969, we wouldn’t HAVE a gay pride parade.

And you know what? Gay Pride Day isn’t a day when the gay community puts its best foot forward so we can beg for some equality. I’ve never seen any straight people ask ME for permission to act like drunken disasters at Mardi Gras and I don’t think I’ve seen Girls Gone Wild videos being used as a reason for revoking marriage rights from heterosexuals.

I’m sick and fucking tired of the gay community having to grovel and always be on our best behavior just to get thrown a few table scraps by the straights.

I’ll happily ride my motorcycle with the freaks and drag queens and I STILL deserve some equality.

Happy Pride Day, Mr. Reeve. Even you are allowed to be proud of who and what you are.

Mr. Reeve says…………………

Since I was a young child my mother used to try and get me to watch the Macy’s Day Parade on Thanksgiving. My parents are from NY and it was a big deal to her. But it wasn’t and isn’t for me and neither is the Rose Parade. Parades are a way for people to see other people and what they represent. I could see the point of parades back in the days before email, youtube, twitter, facebook, text messaging, etc……you get the point. I have been to two parades in my life. I was bored out of my mind for one and the other parade was in South Boston for St. Patrick’s Day where I was being called a “Guinee” by a drunken bitch in a bar.  

With all that being said I will admit that I know zero about the Gay Pride Day Parade. After reading Jasun’s comments and looking at the pictures it looks like a parade with dudes being dudes (can’t see any chicks). I am not one who watches the news (because there is little news and tons of TMZ type crap on it) so I have never heard the MSM’s comments about the parade. The whole showing only “freaks” comment made me think, don’t most parades have freaks in them? Isn’t that the point of being in a parade, to be seen? Of course they are going to show the biggest freaks gay or straight. I think you may be looking for something that isn’t there. People of my generation do not care about someone’s sexual preference as far as I see and hear. Most people I know have friends or family who are openly gay and the average Joe Blow (no pun intended) does not view things like he did 20 years ago. Parade on my friends! Have fun and don’t give a crap what anyone thinks of the parade. If they don’t like it tell them to move to Utah and enjoy that shitty watered down beer and bad underwear. 

And thank you Jasun. I am proud to be me.

Mr. Reeve

I don’t care for her music but she is drinking a beer, flipping off the media and at a Mets game so she scores some points with me.

Mr. Reeve

I saw this guy driving around in Los Angeles. You know that feeling when you’re embarrassed FOR someone?  That’s how I felt today.

EDIT: What’s the opinion amongst gay men regarding sleeveless collared shirts? http://theproblemwithmentoday.com would like to know.

Gay Guys View….
  

From the first time men step on a field they are taught to be tough. Sports are such a “macho” thing in our society. Weather it be fake or real it is what we see when we turn on the TV to watch. Baseball players grabbing their crotch and spitting tobacco out the whole game. Football & hockey players hitting each other so hard they break bones, get concussions, stitches and sometimes stay in the game. Boxing and MMA fighters trying to beat the hell out of each other to be victorious.

I think back to when I played high school sports and in the locker room we used to tease each other about being gay or would say “you trying to look at my junk man”. A young man being homophobic is nothing new. This carries over to adulthood for a lot of straight athletes and I think this has a lot to do with why gay athletes remain quiet and in the closet. It’s easier for them not to be looked at differently by their teammates.

I believe if a top athlete was to come out then sports and the mainstream media would have no choice but to deal with it. It has to be a Lebron James, Peyton Manning, Albert Pujols or Sidney Crosby type superstar athlete though. If these little known athletes come out they get swept under the rug. I think it would be interesting to see how the first high profile gay superstar athlete would be treated by his teammates. When will that be? Not sure. I have watched and listened to tons of sports and talk sports radio over the years and the explanation you hear from most players is that they would just be flat out uncomfortable being in a locker room with a gay teammate.

I will end with a question. Would it be acceptable for a gay teammate to be treated like if he was a woman athlete and be given their own locker room?

EDIT: I have read a few responses to the locker room debate. I would like some feed back from straight guys about this issue. I wouldn’t care if a gay guy was next to me naked in a locker room, but I would say something to anyone staring at me naked and most likely it would be a straight guy. No peter gazing in the locker room boys! It’s not proper locker room etiquette to stare.

Mr. Reeve

The straight guys view:
Since this is our first post I would like to start off with a hello and thank you for checking out the site. I am a straight guy who doesn’t care what people do in their bedrooms, cars, alley ways or at The Motherload. I have always wondered just how truly different a gay guy’s versus a straight guy’s opinion is on guy things. In my opinion gay or straight shouldn’t matter. We are all men and most of the rules apply to both. I do feel that gay guys at times get a free pass when they act like a tool. Every man needs to be held to the same standards. I could be wrong but that’s why I need to see the gay side of it. So here we go………

Ricky Martin “coming out” is about as shocking to me as when George Michael came out in the 90s. Just look at this picture. Straight dudes don’t play on the beach in their Speedos. (Speedos in general are not ok in my opinion but that’s for another post) The only difference now is Ricky’s “Living La Vida Gay” in the open. I know my gay counterpart has a lot to say about this. It just wasn’t a real surprise to me.

The Gay Guy’s View:
Meh. To be honest, I think straight guys get much more of a pass when acting like a tool. Straight guys can have pinups of biki-clad women on their walls at work and go on and on about their girls and the boobs of the newest starlet. Gay guys mention their boyfriends and are accused of “pushing their sexuality in people’s faces.”

I remember being told by a straight woman at a straight wedding that “we don’t go parading through the streets telling everyone we’re straight…”  And she did this as she was taping paper flowers onto the car with the “Just Married” sign on the back of it that was then driven through the streets, horn honking with the newlyweds waving out of the sun roof. The irony on that one caused me to gain three pounds.

Bitch.

Anyway…

Ok, first of all… yes. A lot of people were surprised by Ricky Martin being gay. Please, some of Freddie Mercury’s fans were surprised. Some of George Michael’s fans were surprised. I remember telling a few straight people a few years ago that Ricky Martin was gay and I got scolded by the shocked and angry women that “All you gay guys just want the hot men to be gay.”

(which I guess is true… Kathy Griffin has pointed out that the gays stopped wanting Tom Cruise when he jumped on the couch but now they all want Gyllenhal. And you don’t ever hear us saying “oh girl…. don’t tell me you don’t know about Miss Gene Hackman.”)

I’m always blown away how straight people can occasionally be a little.. clueless. People see my wedding ring and ask me about my wife. I’m like… really? I’m wearing an OxBalls T-shirt and my license plate says “FRATMEN.” You thought I had a wife? I’m so gay I try to close the door to my bedroom closet and my bathrobe laughs at me. I’m so gay the Man from Mars and the Queen of Uranus can tell.

It seems with some people that you have to be Richard Simmons (who’s straight, apparently) before some people even consider the possibility of you liking guys.

But more than that… it matters.

A lot.

Young gay men and for that matter, the general public are sent the message that being gay is something to be ashamed of. Something to be hidden.

I grew up and my only two gay role models were fucking Liberace and Boy George. I look like a big christmas tree in rhinestones so I thought I was fucked.  Back in those days you didn’t come out unless you were about to die of an STD.

I could have used a few Ricky Martins back then… hot men with successful careers (He can still sell out stadiums in the rest of the world which doesn’t, imagine this, end at America’s borders) who weren’t head to toe in Makeup like Adam Lambert or just plain annoying like Clay Aiken.

And at least Ricky Martin came out in a classy way. He didn’t sell the story to People Magazine, show up on Oprah and do The Today Show as part of a big book tour where he whined about how hard life is for a gay guy. There’s no new album, there’s no book, there’s no money to be made off his story… he just quietly posted it to his blog. No fanfare other than the public being surprised that a big star would have the guts to come out when he really didn’t have to.

You know who did the most classless coming out lately if not history?

Chely Wright.

I had no idea who she was a month ago and now I think she’s a rude, desperate twat.

Her manager let out this long, drawn-out, Bait And Switch build up, telling us a HUGE star was about to come out. This was a “Clear Your Calendar” event, we were told.

Then it turns out that the “big star” coming out is some has-been one-hit-wonder from two decades ago that nobody’s heard of and fewer people give a shit about. She’s got a new “poor little lezzie me” book and a new album to flog. She sold her non-story to People magazine and is currently running around telling anyone who’ll pay her any mind that she’s a muff-diver. She yelled it into the Grand Canyon yesterday and it echoed back “Shut Up… You’re Boring Me.”

Even worse is her bullshit about how she used to cry during sex. OK, you know what? No you didn’t. You used to date Brad Fucking Paisley, bitch, and don’t try to frame HIM as some kind of rapist. What a totally tacky, classless thing to say.There’s nothing more lame than someone playing the victim when a victim they ain’t.

Oh, and for the record, if and when Kerry King from Slayer comes out… Back off, bitch.. he’s mine.